The competition for the BIMBO AWARD was fierce this month. We’ve got BIMBOs from the late Eight Belle’s trainer, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud, a UPS spokesman, Charles Barkley, Sarah Jessica Parker, anti-airline activists and an energy company’s Chief Executive Officer. Senator Clinton’s campaign gets three entries alone! If you click through to the FULL BIMBO, the “Wrong Thing to Say” category includes Blackstone chairman Stephen Schwarzman comparing his situation to a noodle salesman when the atom bomb exploded in Nagasaki, the actuary hired by New York State who turned out to be on the payroll of the unions, a plaintiffs’ lawyer spotting the next wave of class action suits, and the District Attorney of San Antonio. A few more “Wrong Thing to Say” comments, but the comments are so bad they’re “insane,” a Republican candidate running for Congress, the Austrian man who locked his daughter in his cellar for 24 years and a Washington DC pastor whose comments are as wild as Rev. Jeremiah Wright’s. One interesting example of motion triggered media with an accompanying survey that explores how much more people remember compared to print and radio.
For the ability to deliver this line with a straight face, the winning BIMBO is from lawyer Duke George who was defending his client, a former female teacher’s aide accused of having sex with students and supplying drugs. One of the student’s mothers discovered them in the living room in the middle of the night and reported them to the police. In his summation, George told the jury, “It’s not against the law to have your head under a blanket.” No. No. No. This was the moment to apologize and throw yourself on the court’s mercy.
The Pittsburgh Tribune Review, “Former teacher’s aide held for trial,” May 16, 2008
RUNNERS- UP
“Horse racing is not that cruel,” said Larry Jones whose filly, Eight Belle’s, was euthanized on the Kentucky Derby track in front of horrified spectators. Matt Lauer immediately responded, “Are you saying there is some level of cruelty in horse racing?” and the rest of the discussion focused on ‘cruelty.’ A good example of how a word can dominate a conversation. Remember, “no bad words!” Jones also missed the chance to talk about what the solution was – more robust breeding. I was amazed no one remembered Barbaro, a filly who suffered the same fate years ago.
The Today Show, May 5, 2008
“I am not a monster,” said the Austrian man who fathered seven children with his own daughter whom he kept in a cellar dungeon. Josef Fritzl said, “I could have killed them all and no one would have ever known.” This guy is so creepy. What kind of punishment could possibly be enough for him? And ‘monster’ is too kind a word. ‘Evil’ is more like it.
ABCNews.com, “Incest Dad: ‘I Am Not a Monster,’” May 7, 2008
“I never took a bribe. I never put a cent in my pocket,” stated Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert at a press conference. Information emerged linking the Prime Minister to an American businessman who contributed hundreds of thousands to dollars to Olmert’s political career. Classic BIMBO. Too much protestation.
The New York Times, “Olmert ‘Never Took a Bribe,’ He Says,” May 9, 2008
“I’m obviously not going to be out for gassing innocent Jews,” said Tony Zirkle who is running for the Republican nomination for Congress in the 2nd district in Indiana. Zirkle is giving the GOP fits. The personal-injury lawyer believes that “we now have a small army of male black porn stars that are sifting through five, ten, fifteen thousand (white) women,” and “The massive number of Jews in the [pornography] industry basically brag about it.” There is nothing redeeming he can say or do. Can you remove someone’s vocal chords?
FoxNews.com, “The Indiana Congressional Candidate the GOP Wishes Would Go Away,” April 30, 2008
“This is not a UPS bill,” said UPS spokesperson Malcolm Berkley about Big Brown’s behind-the-scenes efforts on behalf of legislation to make it easier for unions to target rival FedEx. UPS and FedEx are regulated by different provisions in Federal Law. UPS would like FedEx to have the same problems with unions like the Teamsters that it has. The idea that higher costs get passed to consumers and businesses and hurt small businesses didn’t occur to UPS’ Democratic allies on Capitol Hill.
TheHill.com, “FedEx wins reprieve in Senate Bill,” April 29, 2008
“Our goal isn’t to bankrupt people,” says Recording Industry Association of America counsel Richard Gabriel about the Industry’s tactic of suing thousands of individuals. The RIAA lost a seminal case to a woman who fought back. It turned out she had not illegally downloaded or shared music files. Gabriel also noted that they were “trying to send a message,” but this is a good example of how litigation can’t protect a weakening ill business model. It’s also a tribute to the American jurisprudence system where an individual can fight back against a giant industry.
Business Week, “Does She Look Like a Music Pirate?” May 5, 2008
“I’m not broke,” said Charles Barkley about not paying $400,000 in gambling debts he ran up at the Wynn Las Vegas Resort’s casino. Would the casino lend us money and let us play and lose and not pay back? I’m not holding my breath.
FoxSports.com, “For our sake, let’s hope Chuck’s OK,” May 16, 2008
“I’m not Joan Crawford,” Sarah Jessica Parker told Parade Magazine about how she’s raising son James Wilke. Parker’s whole quote was fine, about the importance of working, giving back to community, enjoying the benefits of hard work. It was the “not Joan Crawford” phrase that stuck out. She should have quit while she was ahead.
Parade Magazine, “America’s Most Fabulous Mom,” May 11, 2008
“The airlines think I’m Satan,” said anti-airline activist Kate Hanni, who has joined forces with Paul Hudson to urge Congress to pass legislation regulating how airlines have to treat passengers during flight delays. Both say they are hopeful, despite the studies showing the increased costs of additional regulation. “I’m not a Don Quixote. I don’t believe in hopeless causes,” said Hudson.
USA Today, “These two fight for fliers’ rights: Former real estate agent, lawyer take on airlines,” May 19, 2008
“There’s just no such thing as a monopoly in our business,” said Byron Kelley, Chief Executive Officer of Regency Energy Partners about why it’s on an acquisition path. Kelley’s full quote was fine: “I tell my people, the challenge is being better and moving faster and quicker than the competition. There’s no such thing as a monopoly in our business. We must win on price, service and value.” They just shouldn’t have dropped the ‘monopoly’ line into the comment.
The Dallas Business Journal, “Riding the Energy Wave: Regency Energy Partners aims to double its asset base with acquisitions,” May 23, 2008
WRONG THING TO SAY
The Clinton campaign had a number of gaffes, none worse that the use of the word “assassination.” Senator Clinton told an editorial board she needed to stay in the race because “We all remember that Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California.” Clinton then compounded the problem by insisting she was only pointing out that several nominations had been decided in June – which no one believed. Example of how word choice matters. Paul Begala, a Clinton strategist, told the media, “We cannot win with eggheads and African-Americans. That’s the Dukakis coalition.” And former Clinton press secretary and current ABC Chief Washington Correspondent, George Stephanopoulos, told Charles Gibson that Clinton was staying in the race to get the VP spot, saying, “Those close to her also say, however, that she is very realistic about this, she is not delusional.” These are supposed to be the most experienced, toughest politicos in the country?
The New York Times, “Clinton’s Reference to Killing of Robert Kennedy Stirs Uproar,” May 24, 2008
CNN, Election Center, May 3, 2008
ABC News, “George’s Bottom Line of Clinton for Veep,” May 7, 2008
“You lose money, you jump out the window, too bad. It’s your problem,” said Vincent Chan, head of China research for Credit Suisse, about a rash of suicides by small investors in China’s barely-regulated stock exchange where many stock’s prices have collapsed. (Guess communism + capitalism missed compassion.)
The Washington Post, “Left Behind on the Road to Capitalism: China’s government fails to act to protect small investors,” May 12-18, 2008
“Trying to buy a mortgage bank in the midst of the subprime crisis was the equivalent of being a noodle salesman in Nagasaki when the atomic bomb went off. Not a lot of noodles left, or even a person, and that’s what happened to us on this deal,” said Blackstone Group Chief Executive Officer Stephen Schwarzman in a meeting about why the proposed deal for mortgage firm PHH fell apart. Mr. Schwarzman has uttered colorful comments before. Apparently no one can get through to him that these comments compete with other things he might want to get across and make him look thoughtless and clueless.
The Wall Street Journal, “A Wise Use of His Noodle? Schwarzman’s Remarks About Japan Prompts Speculation of Backlash,” May 9, 2008
“I got a little bit carried away in my formulation,” said actuary Jonathan Schwartz who was analyzing the financial impact of pension demands by New York labor unions while he was being paid by those same unions. Schwartz described his analysis as “a step above voodoo.” Scary. And disturbing since tax payers will have to pick up the tab for rich pensions granted by law makers.
The New York Times, “Assembly Halts Bills With Figures by Actuary,” May 17, 2008
“It’s like shooting fish in a barrel,” said plaintiffs lawyer, Wes Redmond about a tidal wave of litigation claiming employees were misclassified because of complicated and confusing Department of Labor rules, the Fair Labor Standards Act. The Department Of Labor estimates 70 percent of employees may be incorrectly classified, and companies who try to comply and correct problems may be writing the road map for litigation against themselves. Shameful. Labor should look at how the Federal Trade Commission got the retail housing industry from 90 percent noncompliance with financial advertising and disclosure rules into 90 percent compliance without filing a single lawsuit.
HR Magazine, “Guard Against FLSA Claims,” April 2008
“It’s not like I let an ax murderer out of jail. Had I done that, I’d say ‘string me up,’ but I didn’t,” said Bexar County District Attorney, Susan Reed, about the propriety of getting a friend of her son’s released after only a few hours after he had been arrested for going through airport security with a pistol. She compounded the problem by first insisting she hadn’t done anything wrong, then admitting “I made a mistake” but continuing with the ‘ax murderer’ analogy.
The San Antonio Express, “Ken Rodriguez: Listen to the sound of DA apologizing,” May 22, 2008
Move over, Reverend Jeremiah Wright. Meet pastor Doug Coe, leader of a Washington, DC prayer group of powerful political leaders. At a meeting in 2002, Coe explained that successful individuals could work together for success, all under God, by calling it “a covenant, like the Mafia,” and comparing the DC group to other recognized names. “Look at Hitler, Lenin, Ho Chi Min, bin Laden.” In a 1989 video, Coe introduced this topic, saying “Hitler, Goebbels and Himmler were three men. Think of the immense power these three men had.” Compounding this insane language, David Kuo, former special assistant to President George W. Bush tried to say the comparison was only about commitment. Truly remarkable. A must read.
The New Republic, “Family Ties: Hillary Clinton’s evangelical cabal,” May 28, 2008
NEW MEDIA EXAMPLE
The New York subway system has flat panel video screens in stations which respond to movement. In one, a puppy rolls over when you walk by, and up come the words, “Cottonelle… a nice roll!” promoting the toilet paper. Motion triggered ads are the latest indication of the vast changes in communication, and research backs up that consumers, particularly younger ones, remember the ads much better than print or radio. 74 percent compared to 10-15 percentfor print and radio and only 5 percent recall for internet ads.
The Washington Post, “Captivating an Audience,” April 21-27, 2008
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